


Six Feet Under The Stars

by Gakume



Series: angst and fluff baekyeol edition [2]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Break Up, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-24
Updated: 2017-06-24
Packaged: 2018-11-18 12:39:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,159
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11290920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gakume/pseuds/Gakume
Summary: Baekhyun doesn't believe stars are real, not until he finds his own.





	Six Feet Under The Stars

It was the summer before his senior year when Baekhyun was forced to spend his nights out with his friends. They claimed it's the last summer before graduating high school and becoming officially an adult. Baekhyun didn't really agree with that since they all still looked, sounded and acted like teenagers. "I'm the most mature person among all of us." He remarks while rolling his eyes, sitting in a car at the early evening hours towards the beach. "Who lied to you?" Jongin scoffs and ignores the orange haired boy's glare.

However, it was indeed true; Baekhyun is the mature in the group. He has bigger questions and his interests are quite different than any random teenager.

Baekhyun just sighs softly and shifts his gaze to the window, his eyes observing the night sky as he looked at the stars carefully. "What are you so depressed about?" Baekhyun feels a jab at his ribs which startles him at first before he averts his eyes from the sight to the boy next to him and he doesn't hesitate to send an annoyed look at the other. "Stop annoying me, you fucking psycho." The boy answers and returns to his previous doing. "Just let him be Sehun, he'll be alright once we arrive to the beach." Sehun heard Jongin's voice and all he does is shrugging and turning his attention to his phone instead.

Jongin was wrong; Baekhyun's attitude stayed the same. As they all set their things at the beach, Baekhyun just sits down and watches them run towards the water, holding bottles of beer in their hands. He didn't want to be here, he still doesn't but he was anyway and nothing could get him out of here.

It wasn't long before more people came and settled their belongings next to others' yet Baekhyun didn't seem to care even after Sehun sat down beside him.

With his legs bent, his arms on his knees and his chin on them Baekhyun stared up at the sky once more; something about the way the stars shone made him fall into a deep thought. "It's impossible." Baekhyun suddenly starts and Sehun is taken aback at the boy's abrupt statement. "What is?" The younger one looks at the other however he never got his full attention, only a few words after a long pause.

"How do they shine? The stars?" Now, after what seemed to be a few long minutes Baekhyun turns to look at his friend. Sehun just shrugs, not really sure why would he ask that question when he obviously couldn't answer him. "I don't know."

Baekhyun isn't satisfied with that. He's not satisfied with how Sehun brush his question as if it's not important. How can a massive, luminous sphere of plasma held together by its own gravity shine? How come something so beautiful isn't really real? Is that an illusion? Do we see what we want to? How something as beautiful as that not exist after all?

The orange haired boy wasn't paying attention to the others as time passed by. He was left alone to sink in his own thoughts and silence. What he didn't notice is someone walking towards him and eventually settling beside him. "Beautiful, right?" He heard an unfamiliar deep voice and he quickly looked at the guy beside him, slightly surprised. The boy was looking up at the starry night, doing the same as Baekhyun did before. "Oh, yeah." Baekhyun whispered as if talking any louder will break the peace that was surrounding them while the others kept spending their time in the water.

The brown haired boy was now facing Baekhyun, his smile was bright and wide. "I like looking at them too, it's remarkable." His smile spread even wider and his eye-twitch didn't go unnoticed by Baekhyun. "I'm Chanyeol, sorry if I scared you. I came with Kris and the others." He gave a short explanation before reaching his hand out for the other to shake. It took Baekhyun a few moments to grab his hand and shake it hesitantly. "I'm Baekhyun." He said shortly and swiftly pulled his hand away which made the other's smile fade slightly. "I came with the two other idiots." Baekhyun felt bad for he was being rude to pull his hand too fast and therefore tried to lighten up the mood by encouraging a short conversation.

They both soon found out they have many in common while they spent their time together. One moment though, felt like a life changing one for Baekhyun.

"It's quite fascinating right? I can see why you're enjoying it so much." Chanyeol opened his mouth while they both were lying on the sand, staring up to the dark sky which earned him a glance from Baekhyun since he wasn't expecting the slightly childish boy to talk in such serious and calm tone. The older just nodded, letting the silence to take over before he stated his opinion, "Yeah. It isn't real though. Beautiful yet not real. Impossible. How do they shine?"

Chuckling was all Chanyeol did while his gaze was still fixed at the sky. Baekhyun didn't bother to look at him; he didn't need another useless answer like Sehun's. " _They just do._ " Chanyeol remarked. "Just because something is beautiful doesn't make it less real." Baekhyun was quite confused by the younger's words, not completely sure what the other was trying to say and he turned to look at him, facing the other but before he could say anything he felt the tip of Chanyeol's fingers brush over his cheek, "You're pretty real to me."

A sudden tightening in his chest made Baekhyun completely frozen; it felt as if his heart skipped a beat and he was at a lose of words, his eyes never leaving the other's face.

It was Chanyeol to break their eye connection and stare back the starry night once again. However, Baekhyun was still looking at him, staring at the other's eyes as they sparkled under the stars, reflecting the same beautiful shine in his eyes.

  
  
  


Arms were wrapped around his waist as he pressed his back against the firm chest behind him. "Happy birthday, Baek" The arms tightened around him and he smiled slightly, feeling joy washing over him. "You wished me happy birthday ten times already." Baekhyun rolled his eye playfully and sunk deeper into the other's embrace when the cool breeze hit his face. Although it seemed like a bad idea to sneak up to the roof at night, it was actually quite refreshing, taking a break from all the exams and studies now that they entered a university and finished high school.

"Yes but now I have a gift for you." Chanyeol's words caught him off guard and sudden rush of excitement ran through his body; he didn't say anything though, he just stared at his lover, anticipating.  When the taller pulled his hand out of his pocket and placed his gift in Baekhyun's palm, the latter yet smaller one frowned slightly, curious what it was considering the fact it was smaller than his palm.

Opening his hand, the only thing that left his mouth was a chuckle, fairly amused by what he had received, "A star charm?". Chanyeol nodded, "It's not much but it has deeper meaning, don't you think?" Baekhyun turned his head to face his boyfriend and nodded. Slowly but surely, a smile formed on Baekhyun's face and his heart was beating so loud in his chest he was scared it'll burst out of it or worse than that Chanyeol might hear it.

Truly amazed by how such small piece of silver was now the most precious thing in the whole world for him her held it up to the sky, holding it between his thumb and finger as he stared at the _real_ stars through the hollow part of it. Before Baekhyun could say anything though, his hand was in Chanyeol as he felt substance touching his skin, brushing over it in certain motion and when he looked down to his hand he could see half a star drown over the back of his hand.

The next thing that happened was Chanyeol holding his arm out to the sky, his hand open while the back of it was facing both of them; he had another half. Baekhyun stared at the draw on his hand before holding it up next to Chanyeol. "I love you." Chanyeol was taken aback at the words since Baekhyun was never the one to say sweet words so freely. "Me too." Was all he answered, taking his hand in his and holding it tightly.

Together it completed a shape. _A star_. Together they completed something _beautiful_. Something _real_.

  
  
  


"Get out!" The once calm tone turned into a loud and irritated one. "Take your shit and get the fuck out of my apartment!" The now raging Baekhyun was throwing a fit; he had enough of Chanyeol's stupid arguing and jealous acts. "Really Baekhyun? Really?" Chanyeol's deep voice that rather stayed relaxed and calm was heard although in the inside he was just as mad and equally hurt. "Very mature Byun Baekhyun." He mumbled as he picked up his clothes that were scattered at the ground.

The tall male kept collecting his belongings quietly as the other kept shouting at him, throwing his stuff out of their shared bedroom, throwing the boy's clothes at him. "I don't want to see your stupid face! I don't want to hear your stupid voice! Just get out of my life!" Nothing that Baekhyun said was taken seriously by Chanyeol although he couldn't deny how badly it hurt him to have the one he loves to say such hurtful words.

Just when he thought that Baekhyun calmed down, he wasn't expecting what was about to come and break him. "And take that, I don't want it!" He felt something hit his chest and when he looked down he could see. A silver star was lying on the ground. Just like his own heart, being torn apart, thrown away and left to bleed on the floor.

That day Chanyeol left and with how much Baekhyun wanted to stop him and take everything back he couldn't because if his own pride. He was also mad that the other really left but after all it was his own fault.

  
  
  


Five months after the couple departed, it was Baekhyun who received a phone call from the other. Although the most right thing to do was to pick it up and make up, Baekhyun's pride was still standing tall and he had no intention to give in into the cold war the both of them had. After all, Chanyeol never connected him after their break up which gave Baekhyun another motive to ignore the call and let the other search for him.

He stared at the phone, feeling his chest tightening at the display of the ID caller. Oh how many times he wished to see it and now it was really happening yet unlike all the times he imagined their sweet make up this turned out differently. When the screen went black and the music stopped playing that's when he let out a sigh, telling himself in his mind that next time Chanyeol will call he'll pick it up because he couldn't help but missing him.

What Baekhyun didn’t know was that Chanyeol would never call again and that exact moment was a missed chance.

  
  
  


The closest he got to Chanyeol was a year later but it wasn't Chanyeol who he met, it was the boy's sister. At first Baekhyun was debating whether he should approach her or not but the curiosity about his ex-lover was taking over him and he ended up sitting at a small Café, having a conversation with the sister of his ex-boyfriend.

"How have you been?" Her sweet voice was much more different than the deep one Chanyeol had. Baekhyun stared at her; they had the same eyes and same bright smile. However, they weren't the same eyes and they weren't the same lips.

Baekhyun found himself pointing the difference between the two siblings which made him feel completely uncomfortable considering the fact he was staring at her for too long and how much he paid attention to the little things Chanyeol had. It scared him because he didn't want to miss him although deep inside his heart was screaming for his past love.

Taking a few moments to shake himself out of his trance Baekhyun finally answered politely. "I've been well.. And you?" Truth to be told, that question wasn't even directed to the girl, it was like he was asking Chanyeol himself. "I'm good. I'm sorry I had to stop you from working." Then Baekhyun remembered, the girl's work wasn't even in Korea, it was in London. "I heard from Jongin that you got back to Seoul so I decided to talk to you."

The sounded of that made Baekhyun frown, if she had to come all the way from London to Seoul to chat with him it must be something important.

And then it hit him. Did something happen to Chanyeol? His heart was racing fifty meter for a second and he felt all the emotions he had been pushing aside rising again. It didn't go unnoticed by the woman in front of him. "Calm down Baekhyun. I just need to give you something." Baekhyun wasn't sure if it was reassuring words but it did calm him down eventually.

A plain white envelope was placed in front of him; his name was written on it and he took it in his hand, observing it from both sides but all that was written was his name. He recognized the writing almost immediately, how could he not? It was Chanyeol's.

Even though the girl reassured him before he couldn't shake off the feeling of something wrong, it bothered him. "Where's Chanyeol?" This time his mouth moved on its own, his emotions speaking for him. He wished she'd say that he's at home waiting for him to run back into his arms but much to his dismay it wasn't. "He's.." She hesitated, not sure how to answer her brother's best friend. "He's safe Baekhyun. Don't worry." She nodded and was about to get up only she got stopped by a shaky hand holding her wrist. "Safe.." He mumbled, looking down to the table before averting his gaze back to her, eyes glistening with tears. "Dead.. Right?"

It hurt her to see him like that and with how much she wanted to run away and cry herself at the loss of her own brother she couldn't for Baekhyun needed an explanation, he needed something and she knew it hurt to know the truth but not being aware of it at all would be hurting even more.

She sat back down, pausing for a few moments to get her voice to stay stable without shaking as she began, "Chanyeol.. Was sick.." The shaky hand that was holding her wrist in a death grip loosened but she didn't dare to move away or look up at the pained male. "It was after you guys fought that he was diagnosed." She could recall the doctor's words and how painful it was for her just to sit and listen or even look at her brother's scared gaze. "He went straight to therapies and treatments.. He tried to contact you back then but you didn't―" This time she had the courage to look at him but her heart broke when she saw the man in front of her with tears, eyes empty and a broken look.

Now she knew it was enough. Both her and Baekhyun would shatter completely if she keeps talking.

When she got up from her seat without saying a word she held tightly into Baekhyun's palm and just before she left the table, she reached for her necklace and placed it gently onto the table, "He asked me to hold onto it until it gets back to its rightful owner." And with that, the girl left.

With how much Baehyun was trying to hold back his tears he couldn't fight against the lump in his throat that choked him, making him unable to breathe. His eyes slowly averted towards the object on the table and there it was; his star.

It was sunset time but Baekhyun didn't care, he took the envelope and the charm and made his way towards the beach, feeling like it was the right place to let go of all his emotions and cry endlessly, to share his pain with no one but the memories of the past. He was sitting on the sand, eyes red from crying relentless.

When the sun was gone and the only light that shone above was the moon and the stars that's when Baekhyun decided he should read what he had been so scared to open.

  
  


_Dear Baekhyun,_

_I don't know if you'll ever get this, if you ever accepted this but I think it would be best to try after all._

_I'm sorry my Baekhyun, for I didn't try hard enough to have you in my life again but between countless therapies and treatments I lost all my energy and each day that passed you seemed more and more out of reach._

_I know you hated how I was acting before but is it selfish to try and keep what you love the most the closest to you? Was it really that selfish of me to try and keep you close to my heart?_

_I tried to call you once but you didn’t pick it up. I know it's not an excuse, I could've tried to reach you again but I was scared to face rejection. In my state I wasn't willing to take the risk to feel shattered again when I'm already broken physically._

_I'm guessing you already know I'm not between the living anymore. Don't cry Baek, none of it was your fault. It didn't happen because of you. It just did. That's life, that's how the world works. Just like how the stars shine; they just do._

_Baekhyun, don't forget to shine the brightest because you're more real than anything in this world, you're the most beautiful thing I've ever owned even if we got separated you never lost me not even now._

_I'm always with you my Baekhyun, just look up and I'll be there among the stars, I'll shine the brightest so you'll be able to recognize me. Instead of holding one hand to the sky, hold them both up, from the both of us._

_Never forget that what we have is real. What we have is beautiful. Even when I'm gone it still exists within you and so am I. Live and shine for the both of us._

_I'm six feet under the stars._

_I'll be waiting._

_I love you, Byun Baekhyun._

_Love,_

_Yeol._

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> An old fanfic of mine I decided to share on here as well!  
> Also too lazy to beta this.  
> Hope you enjoyed!


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